Early morning sexual disappointment

I disappoint sex-starved men every day.

My shoes, which are rather manly in every other respect I feel I must point out, well, my shoes sound like dainty stilettos.

When I power walk to work they make a feminine click on the concrete and this seems to affect my fellow male commuters.

You see as I stride behind them, they hear the click and begin to conjure up what they want the woman following them too look like.

In their overworked addled minds they no doubt start to think that a leggy blond with an infectious smile and a tight bottom is only meters away from them.

When they the sneak a look to find out if they are correct, they see me instead.

A podgy midlander, who has bags under his eyes, a permanent frustrated grimace and more importantly, a penis.