Whilst using this fine country's creaking, over-priced shambles of a transport system, I normally get to see some wonderful 'Care in the Community' characters
My favourite this week was a broad very tall black man. He was dressed head to toe in army camouflage and just as the train pulled away from the platform he suddenly sprinted into the carriage sporting a wild panic stricken look.
He ran down the isle of the carriage shouting 'don't move' and 'calm down' at some very tired and generally bemused passengers.
One poor middle aged chap who was walking the opposite way nibbling on a Hobknob, caught the psychotic marine's eye.
Big mistake, of course, never make eye contact - the carriage collectively drew its breath.
The loon grabbed the bloke, who looked like he was completely made of tweed and old Guardian supplements, shuck him and demanded that he 'chilled the fuck out.'
The guy made a face as if he was living his last moments and with utter fright dropped his Hobknob - the nutter crushed it as he continued on his way.
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